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  #2971  
Old 05-18-19, 11:08 PM
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Re: The what's bothering you RIGHT NOW thread Part V

How compulsive are you guys?

I think part of it is my add, part of it is bipolar and a LOT of it is just being immature on my part! lol

I've jumped back into a hobby, and like with most things...I jump in head first. I've been completely obsessed with it and loving it.
I've absolutely been manic. For over a month. I really like my manic episodes as they're usually the times in my life where I'm at my most confident and I excel at things.

It's not all good though...I typically have sleep issues during these times where I don't get nearly as much as I need.

And I can be VERY impulsive at spending money during these periods.
I blew through all the money I had this month quickly acquiring more for the hobby...I've been flat broke for the last 10 or so days. Finally broke down and sold a couple of things on ebay yesterday.
Immediatly made another purchase.
It's like I'm obsessed and it gives me a huge rush to do tons of research and find just the thing I want. Then it's exciting to wait for it in the mail, and it's always a huge joy to open it up and play with it.
Then very soon after I'm looking for the next high. So I start obsessing again, and start hunting for my next purchase.

Meanwhile my cupboards and fridge are damn near empty, my car is without insurance, and I've yet to pay my internet bill this month (not due till the 28th luckily).

I think things will work out...I'm going to put more stuff up on ebay tomorrow (haha...hoping to come up with enough for internet...then I'm SO planning on using the rest to buy the next thing for my hobby! xP ).

All this being said...I very rarely truly regret my purchases. Even after I move on from whatever hobby it is and am no longer interested in it. I love getting new things and the things I do get are usually very nice things, and I freaking love them.
I don't regret any of the purchases I've made in the last month. I'm having a ton of fun with everything. It sucks to be so broke...but at least I don't feel bad about my obsession fueled purchases lol.

Any of you guys relate?
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  #2972  
Old 05-18-19, 11:20 PM
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Re: The what's bothering you RIGHT NOW thread Part V

Do you guys become obsessed with your hobbies? This is very typical for me.
I got back into yo-yoing (lol stop laughing at me!)...and it's become the only thing I ever think about pretty much. I'm constantly on a facebook group and a couple of forums...as well as youtube and a big online yoyo store chatting with people and trying to figure out what I NEED next lol. I've got a damn nice collection of yo-yos now.
I'm really getting down a lot of the old tricks I was able to do too!

It's a rush. Whatever the hobby is at the time. It's like I get high off of it.

Is this more to do with add, or bipolar? I know it's a mixture of both. I may e-mail my pill lady and ask if I can increase some meds I'm on that are suppose to help with my 'highs' (she has me on it to help my brain from racing so much at night which makes it super hard to fall asleep).

I don't really think it's super unhealthy for the most part. Though when I start overspending like I am, and when I start having a really hard time failing asleep cause I'm so buzzed up about the hobby...then it starts getting unhealthy.

Do you guys do the same? Completely obsess on your hobbies?
Is this hyperfocusing? Or is this something else?
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  #2973  
Old 05-19-19, 09:51 AM
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Re: The what's bothering you RIGHT NOW thread Part V

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Originally Posted by psychopathetic View Post
Do you guys become obsessed with your hobbies? This is very typical for me.
I got back into yo-yoing (lol stop laughing at me!)...and it's become the only thing I ever think about pretty much. I'm constantly on a facebook group and a couple of forums...as well as youtube and a big online yoyo store chatting with people and trying to figure out what I NEED next lol. I've got a damn nice collection of yo-yos now.
I'm really getting down a lot of the old tricks I was able to do too!

It's a rush. Whatever the hobby is at the time. It's like I get high off of it.

Is this more to do with add, or bipolar? I know it's a mixture of both. I may e-mail my pill lady and ask if I can increase some meds I'm on that are suppose to help with my 'highs' (she has me on it to help my brain from racing so much at night which makes it super hard to fall asleep).

I don't really think it's super unhealthy for the most part. Though when I start overspending like I am, and when I start having a really hard time failing asleep cause I'm so buzzed up about the hobby...then it starts getting unhealthy.

Do you guys do the same? Completely obsess on your hobbies?
Is this hyperfocusing? Or is this something else?
I went through a stage of collecting stones and hyperfocussed on them
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  #2974  
Old 05-19-19, 06:05 PM
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Re: The what's bothering you RIGHT NOW thread Part V

Bullying prevention required course is reminding me of my school career. Both being passively inactive in the face of bullying (but it was a pure survival tactic) and also being the target.
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  #2975  
Old 05-22-19, 09:14 AM
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Re: The what's bothering you RIGHT NOW thread Part V

Sometimes I stress myself out committing myself to so many things..

And you know it's bad when your hobby starts feeling like a job...
...although my "hobby" might be more of a compulsion... collecting and sorting music into playlists.
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  #2976  
Old 05-23-19, 06:00 AM
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Re: The what's bothering you RIGHT NOW thread Part V

Incompetence. In a word. It’s 2019 not 1998 and input on an important decision is being solicited a la People Magazine’s first online poll in which Hank the drunken dwarf was voted America’s most beautiful person.
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  #2977  
Old 05-23-19, 06:27 AM
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Re: The what's bothering you RIGHT NOW thread Part V

Stepped on some metal that went into my foot about half centimetre. Now I'm waiting forever in a walk in clinic because I haven't had a term is shot for 12 years. Ugh
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  #2978  
Old 05-23-19, 11:55 AM
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Re: The what's bothering you RIGHT NOW thread Part V

Teeth cleaning appointment today. I hope I can lay on my back Valium should help.
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  #2979  
Old 05-23-19, 12:18 PM
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Re: The what's bothering you RIGHT NOW thread Part V

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Teeth cleaning appointment today. I hope I can lay on my back Valium should help.
Benzos for the win!

Cheers,
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Old 05-23-19, 12:48 PM
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Re: The what's bothering you RIGHT NOW thread Part V

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Benzos for the win!

Cheers,
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Yes, the trifecta of benzos and nitrous or Missy gets Messy.
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Old 05-23-19, 12:59 PM
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Re: The what's bothering you RIGHT NOW thread Part V

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Teeth cleaning appointment today. I hope I can lay on my back Valium should help.
I had mine cleaned a couple of weeks ago. The guy was amazing.
Of course I was still very tensed up because the last time was so bad that I
didn't even let the tech finish.

It's May, so I'm bothered by being in tornado alley.
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Old 05-23-19, 01:34 PM
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Re: The what's bothering you RIGHT NOW thread Part V

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Stepped on some metal that went into my foot about half centimetre. Now I'm waiting forever in a walk in clinic because I haven't had a term is shot for 12 years. Ugh
Eeek!

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Old 05-23-19, 01:54 PM
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Re: The what's bothering you RIGHT NOW thread Part V

It's been a long month.
Not a horrible month...I'm not depressed or anything.
Just a bit rough.

I've been VERY manic all month...I love my highs (I've got bipolar)...I always feel so damn good in those highs!
Unfortanenly those highs come with all sorts of sleeping issues, hyper focusing to the point where I focus on nothing but whatever it may be at the moment, and often times comes with a lot of compulsive spending.
I'm flat broke this month. It's by far the toughest month I've had in the last couple of years money wise.

My dad's been talking about a big Las Vegas trip we were going to take, for months. He's been saving money for it and had it all set aside...we even sold something on ebay for $2,000 last month he was going to use for the trip. He's been telling me he's got $500 in 10 and 20 dollar bills he was going to give me for the trip and everything.
I was very excited about the trip. It may well be the last trip him and I have together (his heart is very weak).
Well...he called me a week or 2 ago, and he informs me he has no money anymore and that we weren't going to Vegas.
I'm about 80% certain he took a trip to Nevada here in the past month or so, and spent all of it at a casino. Even though he completely denies it...he's got a very serious addiction to gambling.
I haven't talked to him since.

And my mom's been gone now for 2 years on the 16th of this month.
I miss her so much...but I haven't been too upset this month over her passing thankfully. But dang...I'm having such horrible nightmares involving here this past week. Very sad ones. She was in constant chronic pain due to a knee injury from 25+ years ago...the other day I had a nightmare where some kind of gaint took her and ripped her bottom half of her leg off so I took her in a car to get her to a hospital. She'd passed out from the pain, but when she woke up she was in EXTREME pain and I felt so helpless and horribly twisted up about it.
The feeling lingered all day after waking up.
And I had a dream the other day where I was at her house and we were just hanging out and talking and everything was back to normal again, and everthing was okay again. Life felt easier.
Then I woke up and reached for my phone so I could call her and see if she wanted to go do something.
Only I remembered that I can't call her. There can be no normal again. Life can never be as easy as it was when she was here.
/sigh

...That, and it's nearly June.
Only it's been snowing and cold and yucky for the past week here! >.<'

Oh, and I need to have my apartment inspected here in the next week...but I've still got a bit to do (not a whole lot) to get it ready. I keep saying I'm going to do it...but I'm having a hard time doing so.
The lady helping me will be here tomorrow though. I think I'll call her today and see if she wouldn't mind coming over for 2 hours instead of 1.
(Though she would and has offered...I don't actually have her help me with any cleaning. I just have her come over and chat haha...but she's so damned non judgmental and supportive for me...like MUCH needed nourishment for my soul...a friend. And she gently pushes me into getting things done. (She's VERY good/skilled in knowing how to push me in a way that's firm, but gentle. I shut down quick when people start pushing me too hard and start resenting them...I've been seeing her for 6+ months now, and there hasn't been a hint of resentment I've developed for her. She's just so damn non judgmental. Plus she's told me her house gets as bad as mine, so she totally gets it.)

So I'm good...it's just been a long month.
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  #2984  
Old 05-23-19, 03:26 PM
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Re: The what's bothering you RIGHT NOW thread Part V

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Originally Posted by psychopathetic View Post
It's been a long month.
Not a horrible month...I'm not depressed or anything.
Just a bit rough.

I've been VERY manic all month...I love my highs (I've got bipolar)...I always feel so damn good in those highs!
Unfortanenly those highs come with all sorts of sleeping issues, hyper focusing to the point where I focus on nothing but whatever it may be at the moment, and often times comes with a lot of compulsive spending.
I'm flat broke this month. It's by far the toughest month I've had in the last couple of years money wise.

My dad's been talking about a big Las Vegas trip we were going to take, for months. He's been saving money for it and had it all set aside...we even sold something on ebay for $2,000 last month he was going to use for the trip. He's been telling me he's got $500 in 10 and 20 dollar bills he was going to give me for the trip and everything.
I was very excited about the trip. It may well be the last trip him and I have together (his heart is very weak).
Well...he called me a week or 2 ago, and he informs me he has no money anymore and that we weren't going to Vegas.
I'm about 80% certain he took a trip to Nevada here in the past month or so, and spent all of it at a casino. Even though he completely denies it...he's got a very serious addiction to gambling.
I haven't talked to him since.

And my mom's been gone now for 2 years on the 16th of this month.
I miss her so much...but I haven't been too upset this month over her passing thankfully. But dang...I'm having such horrible nightmares involving here this past week. Very sad ones. She was in constant chronic pain due to a knee injury from 25+ years ago...the other day I had a nightmare where some kind of gaint took her and ripped her bottom half of her leg off so I took her in a car to get her to a hospital. She'd passed out from the pain, but when she woke up she was in EXTREME pain and I felt so helpless and horribly twisted up about it.
The feeling lingered all day after waking up.
And I had a dream the other day where I was at her house and we were just hanging out and talking and everything was back to normal again, and everthing was okay again. Life felt easier.
Then I woke up and reached for my phone so I could call her and see if she wanted to go do something.
Only I remembered that I can't call her. There can be no normal again. Life can never be as easy as it was when she was here.
/sigh

...That, and it's nearly June.
Only it's been snowing and cold and yucky for the past week here! >.<'

Oh, and I need to have my apartment inspected here in the next week...but I've still got a bit to do (not a whole lot) to get it ready. I keep saying I'm going to do it...but I'm having a hard time doing so.
The lady helping me will be here tomorrow though. I think I'll call her today and see if she wouldn't mind coming over for 2 hours instead of 1.
(Though she would and has offered...I don't actually have her help me with any cleaning. I just have her come over and chat haha...but she's so damned non judgmental and supportive for me...like MUCH needed nourishment for my soul...a friend. And she gently pushes me into getting things done. (She's VERY good/skilled in knowing how to push me in a way that's firm, but gentle. I shut down quick when people start pushing me too hard and start resenting them...I've been seeing her for 6+ months now, and there hasn't been a hint of resentment I've developed for her. She's just so damn non judgmental. Plus she's told me her house gets as bad as mine, so she totally gets it.)

So I'm good...it's just been a long month.
Big hugs for you, psycho
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Old 05-23-19, 03:39 PM
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Re: The what's bothering you RIGHT NOW thread Part V

Hayfever is a pain in the unmentionables this summer
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