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  #106  
Old 05-13-11, 09:28 AM
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Re: eshperiful...in memoriam

Its early,the air is still brisk,I haven't started driving so the world has still not reared its ugly head at me yet. This is the time I wax poetic and conscienceness is somewhere between dream state and grabbing 6th gear. Esh has been on my mind since I woke up a little while ago from Earl slapping his paw across my face.

He was 19yrs younger than me,but he had an old soul. He started incredible threads here. Heck he started MORE threads than anybody,I think! He wrote amazing and funny limericks and gosh,playing the acronym game was always fun with him. But most of all he was 'different'. He touched and was touched by nymphs and fairies and ghosts and demons. His body,and all its shortcomings couldn't contain the free spirit contained within.


Last year I lost my mom and went into a terrible depression. I just dug a hole and climbed in and hid. And hid. If one wants to be alone,truckdriving is a great way to do it and still make a living. A lot of people from here tried to get to me through phone calls and emails,but I couldn't talk to anyone,I couldn't find words and was just too overwhelmed by EVERYTHING! I almost gave up trucking to live under the bridge with the others I saw living there,but I couldn't ask Earl to suffer for something he had nothing to do with.

So I just hid in my bunk and passed the time reading books and listening to comedy on youtube. Then I remembered that Esh had recorded some of his ramblings on youtube as well and I started listening to him at night as I fell asleep. If you've listened to him you know what a soothing quality his voice has,like a leaf floating along on a meandering brook.

I liked that I could go there and visit him without anyone ever knowing I was there,including him. Finally I was ready to say hi and left a little note in the comment section. That was the start of me coming back to the light. Then by a stroke of luck I was sent over to Salleh's neck of the woods and made the jump and called her and called Tigger too. But in my mind,it was Eshkaron's lilting soliloquies that called me back and I'll always have a bit of him to listen to on my bad days.

Dearest Peri,you will both swirl in the forest glen again. He is in your heart and
living there in the peace he so deserves. I'm glad he was loved by so many. He will be missed by just as many.
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  #107  
Old 05-13-11, 05:12 PM
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Re: eshperiful...in memoriam

shaney's beautiful voice didn't come through as well when recorded with his droid. i listened to him practice quite frequently, but my favorite was that he'd sing me to sleep.

a friend from long ago found a recording of shaney and you can hear mellifluous voice. the pictures in the video are either early nineties or from the podcasts he more recently did with his cousin.


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  #108  
Old 05-13-11, 05:17 PM
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Re: eshperiful...in memoriam

I dont know how to help you or what to tell you peripatetic but if you need anything or just a shoulder to cry on and listen to Im here for you.
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  #109  
Old 05-13-11, 05:26 PM
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Re: eshperiful...in memoriam

Thanks Peri!!!!!! Awesome video. It was nice to see him smiling.
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  #110  
Old 05-13-11, 07:18 PM
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Re: eshperiful...in memoriam

I am very sorry for your loss.
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  #111  
Old 05-13-11, 08:07 PM
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Re: eshperiful...in memoriam

Thanks peri. Thanks Shane.

oh sorry Shane,I forgot to take my shoes off before I started counting...you are 21 yrs younger than me.
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  #112  
Old 05-13-11, 11:55 PM
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Re: eshperiful...in memoriam

the interment was today and i must say that this has been the single worst day of all. i'm going to watch every video he ever made for me, i've decided--fortunately i have dozens and dozens and dozens

then, later, we twirl
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  #113  
Old 05-14-11, 12:10 AM
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Re: eshperiful...in memoriam

What is we twirl mean,is that to dance?Im sorry I seem so dense right now.
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  #114  
Old 05-14-11, 12:26 AM
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Re: eshperiful...in memoriam

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rebelyell View Post
What is we twirl mean,is that to dance?Im sorry I seem so dense right now.
As I understand it, Esh and peri would listen to music together, look at each other on FaceTime (video chat) and dance and twirl or spin around. That's what she's referring to.
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  #115  
Old 05-14-11, 08:09 AM
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Re: eshperiful...in memoriam

I havent been on for a while & I'm shocked and so very sorry for your loss.....my thoughts are with you peri...
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  #116  
Old 05-15-11, 08:43 AM
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Re: eshperiful...in memoriam

Peri I'm sorry for your loss. If they do grief counselling through work maybe take advantage of that. They can give you advice if you start to find the grief is taking over your ability to cope.
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  #117  
Old 05-15-11, 04:55 PM
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Re: eshperiful...in memoriam

In situations like these, I'm never good with words. Too much to say, nothing really comes out.
I haven't had a chance to get to know him, I can still read his posts and learn, I guess. But judging by all the other replies, he must have been good.

I made this photo once, to give to someone in a similar situation. It's the candle holder I use to remember good people by, and still let them light my life. The figure reminds me that there is no end, just another beginning...


Go, Be At Peace
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  #118  
Old 05-15-11, 05:10 PM
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Re: eshperiful...in memoriam

I loved posting in his story threads.
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  #119  
Old 05-15-11, 06:03 PM
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Re: eshperiful...in memoriam

peri, I am very sorry for your loss.
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  #120  
Old 05-15-11, 08:07 PM
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Re: eshperiful...in memoriam

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