How to NOT quit hobbies?

[namazu]

Originally Posted by psychopathetic

Oh yes Ever since I've been able to stand on my 2 feet again a few days ago Ive been back at it...and in fact I had a pretty major break through 2 days ago (I realized that I was subconsciously telling myself I could never do some of the amazing tricks I was watching others do...and that kind of thinking was completely stopping me from progressing. I wasn't even trying to do new things because I was telling myself I couldn't...so why even bother? After the realization, I've realized that I absolutely CAN do these things. Like how ridiculous it is to think that I never can! Of course I can!! It'll just take time and practice. I might not be able to pull these things off right now today, but I sure as heck can get there!).

This realization has really re-energized me for this hobby. Been working on a pretty cool combo now too that even just a week ago I would've told myself I couldn't do.

Go, you!

[Daniel1970]

Originally Posted by midnightstar

There is nothing wrong with hopping between hobbies, psycho, hobbies are there for you to enjoy, its not a jail sentence "you MUST do this hobby for this length of time or else"

Sometimes it's hard for us ADHD folks in this "can do", "stick to it", "sweat, push it, work, get up every day at 4 am and do your Peleton workout you're a WINNER!!" society. We have a harder time focusing on one thing and sticking with it. We get distracted. We lose interest. Our mind wanders. We want to try something new. So if you have ADHD and you don't live up to the lifestyle the discipline warriors want to shove down your throat, please don't give yourself a hard time.

D.

[stef]

"discipline warriors"
i never understood them. I have to be happy and looking forward to doing something or it's just not happening.

[Daniel1970]

Originally Posted by stef

"discipline warriors"
i never understood them. I have to be happy and looking forward to doing something or it's just not happening.

See, that's a very ADHD attitude - I see it with my ADHD daughter all the time.

I don't want to put a value statement or judgment on that - it is what it is, but other people are going to judge you for it and maybe a lot of us are internalizing that judgment, especially in the U.S. which is such a judgmental society.

D.

[Stevuke79]

The idea that you have to stick with something was ingrained into me at an early age. It's hard. But you need to have the attitude that you just have to do it.

If you don't or if you can't.. I actually dont think you will end up sticking with anything. Everything gets hard. Doing something long term means there are days that you will not want to do it. That's just life. There is no way to ALWAYS want to do something.

[Traveler5]

I've tried various hobbies and they almost always come to a screeching halt after a while. I just get bored with them. Some of them have cost me a lot of money to get into (golf, collecting guns, cross-country skiing). I don't know that I'll ever step on a golf course again, yet I have a nice set of expensive clubs and accessories sitting in my garage. I get bored with some of them because they require skill, time, and a lot of effort: Golfing. I keep the equipment because - you never know - I may get back into it. I just lose interest in these hobbies real fast. With some of them, I'll buy the equipment (photography) and think I'll read that super technical/thick owners manual to learn how to use it but I never get around to it (because I don't have the patience to read everything and I procrastinate). Then the equipment sits in its bag in my closet and gets used only once a year. Oh, well. Here's hoping I don't get into collecting Llamas.

[acdc01]

Honestly psycho, I think your expectations of yourself are too high. From the video you showed, you are already good at yoyoing.

And practicing daily for 20 weeks, this is way more than the average NT could do already. I imagine there are some pros or extreme amateurs that can do more but those people are well above the norm for even a NT.

It's like not being able to be happy with yourself unless you can train like an Olympian and win the gold medal. The standards are too high. Maybe you are burning yourself out with your extreme expectations.

Hobbies are supposed to be for fun. Not to become excellent at.

I myself rotate interests. I'm super interested in something for a while, play it a ton, and then get bored and find something else that I become super interested in l, play to an extreme, and then get bored of. I actually usually cycle back to old hobbies but it can take years, even a decade sometimes. And it's fine so long as I have some interest most of the time.

My only constant interests are watching TV and playing on the Internet lol.

[Lizzie80]

Originally Posted by psychopathetic

So I jump head first into hobbies.
They become my world! I absolutely love them! I even start to get decent at some of them sometimes.
Then usually pretty quickly...I quit altogether as if the hobby never meant a thing to me. All the motivation and momentum just vanishes.
There's usually something that triggers this...most times it's because I'm hard on myself and get disappointed in my lack of progress.

I've talked with others here on the forums who struggle with this as well.

Any tips on how not to quit? It can be so hard to keep going when I start feeling that momentum slowing. I have a hard time keeping myself motivated when I don't feel like I'm making progress.

I'm in a hobby that I've gone overboard on (yo-yoing lol)...but over the last couple of months I've been feeling myself going through the same loop and I'm afraid I'm going to quit.
And that makes me really sad. Cause I really want to stick with this one! I love this one.

Hey Twitch. I think many ADDers will go through a lot of hobbies throughout their lives. I think it's just par for the course with our hyperfocus, energy cycles, tendency to burn ourselves out quickly, take on hobbies impulsively and without thinking through whether we REALLY want to take a hobby on long-term.

Maybe the keys to developing lasting hobbies can be put down to a few basic principles.

1. When thinking of starting a hobby, look back over your life to see what you've always had an interest in. If you've always loved drawing and appreciating any form of artistry for a good while, wanting to try out painting, or coloring in gorgeous adult coloring books, there's a good chance this new hobby would stick around. However, if this hobby is something out in left field and you have no prior appreciation for or interest in anything close to this new thing, look at it a little more closely.
2) ADDers love the new and the shiny, go big or go home, things requiring a lot of time and talent - nothing wrong with that. However, consider the cost of taking on this new hobby in time, energy, focus, and talent required to engage in at the level you think you want to get to. If it's a coloring book and a set of metallic gel pens, we're not talking a big splurge. If you end up ditching the hobby, you won't be out much money, and you can pass on the items to someone who will use them.
3) What are the space requirements for this hobby, and will that work for you? Again, our good old coloring book and markers will take up almost no real estate, but some hobbies require much more space and supplies to keep clean, organized and in good condition.
4) If you are like me and almost prefer the shopping for all the spiffy new items a fresh hobby will require, create an Amazon wish list for these things you want to purchase. Just leave it be for a few days. If you keep ady new items to that list, and you keep adding new things, keep thinking about engaging in that hobby, repeatedly find yourself wishing that you were doing that hobby, those are good signs. When you can afford, buy a small item or two, something that will help you make a good head start on things. If you keep working on that hobby regularly and have the money and the need for another, buy it. Just go slowly and buy things as you actually find yourself needing.
5) Set aside regular time for your hobby. Do it for fifteen minutes a day (or as much time as you need to finish one decent chunk of work), as many days a week as are practical. You can do a little art every day, or aim to go to a yoga class twice a week. Whatever is appropriate.
6) A hobby should stretch us some and challenge us a little, but still be fun and make us feel joy.

[kwalk]

Make yourself do it every day or switch off if you can’t do it that day

[Goofycook]

The one hobby I never quit is Cooking and drawing. Those two are my passions. I made a career out of cooking and the drawing is something I just do to keeping my hands busy and mind clear. other things come and go and sometimes come back.

[Monox D. I-Fly]

Probably the only hobbies of mine which I do consistently are solving math questions (because that's how I make a living) and browsing internet forums. Others are just come and go, though my interests still stick to more than half of them.

[Urobouros]

My wife & I joke that I don't have hobbies, I have obsessions I've had many, many over the years but have found a couple that stick. I struggle with hyper-focus so the simple desire to find a new passion is often enough to keep me looking. Unfortunately, getting around the cost of said search is another matter but I'll share as soon as I figure it out

[psychopathetic]

I'm still at it. In fact I'm more into it now then I have been.

[namazu]

That was really cool, psychopathetic!

It looks like you've been practicing a lot -- well executed!

(I love the names of some of the tricks, too.)

[namazu]

How are you doing, psychopathetic? What tricks have you been working on?


I saw this article today and thought of this thread: "Why Can’t I Commit to a Hobby?" by Katie Heaney, 31 Jan 2020, in the "Science of Us" section of The Cut (It wasn't necessarily such an illuminating article, but seemed a propos, nonetheless.)