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  #1  
Old 02-11-11, 04:36 PM
Nancy18 Nancy18 is offline
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Question therapist is too young for me...

So, I finally made an appointment at an agency to get some therapy regarding ADD - I can't afford it any other way at the moment (they have sliding scale). Well, the therapist they assigned to me is in the midst of getting her Master's degree, and from what I can tell on the phone, is in her early to mid-20s at the very oldest. I did tell her over the phone that she sounds young and it could be a problem for me.

Honestly, I think it's too young. How can someone so young understand what I'm going through? I've had so many more life experiences - and it would be weird to me to get "advice" from someone who could be my niece. Plus, my narrow minded self is imagining all this young woman will do is just mirror what I say and do a lot of "uh huh's" and "how does that make you feel" kind of shtick.

Has anyone else had this experience? I feel kinda stuck because I do need therapy but at the moment I can't afford the experts. Am I being too narrow minded or is this a case of beggars can't be choosers?
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Old 02-11-11, 04:46 PM
bricaru bricaru is offline
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Re: therapist is too young for me...

I dont want to offend but are you really that much older than the girl (didnt look at ur profile). For all you know even though she is young she could have had a lot of crap happen to her. That is maybe why she is studying to be a therapist. I am in my mid-20s and I prob have gone through more than some people do until they are middle aged.
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Old 02-11-11, 04:49 PM
exptherainbow exptherainbow is offline
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Re: therapist is too young for me...

I would say give her a chance - she may be young (and I will admit, I am also young so my opinion may be biased), but she will have training and she may work with a number of people who are similar in age to you who have shaped her insights.

Also, often younger people in the medical professions are more fresh out of their training, more up to date on the latest research, and aren't yet "jaded" so they have a lot of enthusiasm to try and help you get to where you want to be.

And if it doesn't work out, perhaps you can talk to the agency and discuss the possibility of getting another therapist. But before you dismiss her entirely, go to your appointment with an open mind. Worst case scenario: it won't help you, but it probably won't hurt you either.
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Old 02-11-11, 04:58 PM
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Re: therapist is too young for me...

I think I know what you mean Nancy18. I had to confront similar feelings recently when, after my first ADHD diagnosis, I was referred (by native health services, which has college student professionals - in - training "work" for them in a loan waiving program) to a counselor and organizer who -looked and sounded - to be no older than twenty five, and that's stretching it.

I should be the understanding type because 1) I look and sound younger than my age and I can't help but be aware of the silliness that comes with that and 2) though I'm not a counselor, I've been on the other side of this situation from the age of eighteen and 3) I'm in my twenties.

On the other hand in case it matters, my pharmacist is I think my age or younger and I don't give a second thought to asking her advice - because it's different.

I get what you're saying, Nancy18. I don't think you're being petty or need to rise above anything here. I read it like you're keeping in mind the person that you used to be at that younger age, and all the truly unexpected turnslife takes us on and the hard-to-explain lessons we get from them? And that even if this young professional is fantastic, you have a perfectly understandable "blocker" in place that prevents your fully opening up, therapeutically?

Maybe experienced people in your area offer a sliding scale? I notice that all or most of the ones in my area, including a really experienced psychiatrist, do. You might have to call to find out.
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Old 02-11-11, 05:02 PM
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Re: therapist is too young for me...

Bricaru and exptherainbow - you both do have a point. It's just that I'm imagining that talking to her will be like talking to one of my young cousins (who although are intelligent, are, well, pups!). This person is also being supervised, so maybe that's a plus. I might give it a go - not sure. I just wanted to know if anyone had been through therapy with someone who is much younger than them, and if so, how it went
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Old 02-11-11, 05:06 PM
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Re: therapist is too young for me...

My new doctor is young, 28ish, maybe 29. I felt the same at first, but then I realized she was okay. She seemed more open to listen to me about things, whereas, in the past, most of the older doctors blew me off and said "well this is this and that is that, an that's all there is to it." I think it honestly depends on you as a person, and her as a person. You might decide you like her as a therapist, but not as a person, and that might turn you off, or vice versa.

Plus, I wanted to mention: just because she's young doesn't mean she won't be able to relate at all. I mean, for all you know someone in her family could have ADD as well, or maybe even an SO or a friend.

I say give her a shot, and if you honestly feel like it isn't working, then maybe you should wait until you can afford someone more to your liking.
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Old 02-11-11, 05:09 PM
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Re: therapist is too young for me...

Ageism is discrimination.

Sorry.
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Old 02-11-11, 05:12 PM
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Re: therapist is too young for me...

Other than age what else do you want in a therapist? If she has all the other qualities you are looking for could you over look her age?
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Old 02-11-11, 05:13 PM
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Re: therapist is too young for me...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Impromptu_DTour View Post
Ageism is discrimination.

Sorry.

People, even people whose options appear to be limited because of funds, get to be discriminating when it comes to how they allot those funds and who they confide in therapeutically.


If the young counselor's employer or supervisor treat her (their employee or charge, the counselor) unfairly simply because of her age, that is age discrimination.
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Old 02-11-11, 05:33 PM
Tommy Wilhelm Tommy Wilhelm is offline
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Re: therapist is too young for me...

Her age couldn't be the sum of who she is though; she might lack the insight you'd need, because of her age she could very well be more likely to lack it; but it's not nothing to do a masters degree, and this could be the person you were always looking for, only back a little in time, so to speak.
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Old 02-11-11, 05:34 PM
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Re: therapist is too young for me...

Another thing to keep in mind is that it's not necessarily a therapist's job to tell you why you are how you are and give you advice based on that. Rather, it's their job to ask the right questions in order to evaluate which therapy methods might be best suited to your needs, and then properly help you implement those therapy methods.

I'm not saying she isn't too young. I'd be uncomfortable too. But she's not supposed to give you advice based on life experience - being a psychologist doesn't entail that you must somehow be a wise old soul to boot. Also, keep in mind that there are potential benefits to having a young therapist - she'll be eager to learn, typically happy to do extra research to help out when she can, and possibly be more up-to-date on current theories and practices than someone who's been out of the academic setting for a while. Not saying those things would overcome my own doubts - in fact, they did not - but it is something to keep in mind if you feel you absolutely need the therapy and know you can't afford anything else.
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Old 02-11-11, 05:35 PM
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Re: therapist is too young for me...

Quote:
Originally Posted by exptherainbow View Post
I would say give her a chance - she may be young (and I will admit, I am also young so my opinion may be biased), but she will have training and she may work with a number of people who are similar in age to you who have shaped her insights.

Also, often younger people in the medical professions are more fresh out of their training, more up to date on the latest research, and aren't yet "jaded" so they have a lot of enthusiasm to try and help you get to where you want to be.

And if it doesn't work out, perhaps you can talk to the agency and discuss the possibility of getting another therapist. But before you dismiss her entirely, go to your appointment with an open mind. Worst case scenario: it won't help you, but it probably won't hurt you either.
Yeah, what s/he said.
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Old 02-11-11, 05:36 PM
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Re: therapist is too young for me...

I agree that you should give her a chance. You may be surprised and find a woman in her 40's who just sounds young. Or, maybe she is young but quite competent.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nancy18 View Post
I've had so many more life experiences - and it would be weird to me to get "advice" from someone who could be my niece.
Also, a good therapist won't give a lot of "advice". They will listen, and will act as your guide as you find the solutions that are right for you. The ability to do this has more to do with their training and their personality than their age or life experiences.
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Old 02-11-11, 05:37 PM
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Re: therapist is too young for me...

fresh out of school , ready to prove herself, and book learned in all the new junk


sounds like it might be worth a shot
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Old 02-11-11, 05:42 PM
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Re: therapist is too young for me...

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Originally Posted by daveddd View Post
fresh out of school , ready to prove herself, and book learned in all the new junk


sounds like it might be worth a shot

and for a steal
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